NapjunkieMom

Jon was retelling a story told to him by one of his kindergarten pals, and said, "But he's not a reliable source."

We were looking at my Valentine's day chocolates and Robert noticed that some of them had R's on them. "Those have my name on them," he said.  I said, "What do you think they're filled with, roast beef?"

I was chatting with my brother on Facebook, and mentioned Jon.  He was watching as I typed and said, "Thanks for spelling my name right."

Jon:  "Which do you like better, crickets or spiders?"  Me:  "Crickets."  Jon:  "What if the spider brought you a cup of coffee in bed every morning?"

I got some samples from the dentist today, and Jon asked what kind I received.  "Did you get Aquafresh or Peanutbutter Bottomfeeder?"  She was out of Peanutbutter Bottomfeeder.

I was making heart shaped cookies for "Cookie Communion" and had written on them "I LUV UU".  Jon looked at the container and said, "What do they say, TOUGH NUTS?"

Robert asked me this during his piano practice today:  "Who is the better composer:  Bach, Mozart or this Rubik's Cube?"

Robert has named the large snow pile in our church's parking lot as "Mount Falltoyourdoom".

Both children, but especially Jon, have a morbid streak.   After the umpteenth mention of cannibalism, I said, "How did I get such a morbid child?"  Jon's answer:  "You drank beer when I was in your tummy."  My response:  "Number one I don't drink beer, and number two, I gave you a book about where babies come from.  Didn't you read it?"

Jon asked me about dogs, and why there were so many different kinds.  I told him that the big ones were bred for guarding and other kinds of work.  "What are the little ones for?" "The littles ones are for companionship, because you don't want a 150 lb. dog on your lap."  "What about the kind that come on buns?"

Jon made his own valentines for his classmates this year.  Most of them said, "Happy Valentine's Day" or the more effusive "Happy Valentine's Day, dude".  For a special few, he wrote down things he knew they liked, so a couple of Valentines said simply, "Hockey" or "2 hour delay"

They grow up so fast.   One day they are playing with Legos, and the next they are forming rock bands.    Jon's band is "Snake Battle" and Robert's band is "Alien Octopus".

Robert is sitting at his computer and singing, "I'm a big fan of nachos, and everybody knows it."

Jon had just got back from soccer practice and wanted a second breakfast.  "How about oatmeal?" I asked.  "No, I want something more manly--toast with cinnamon and sugar," he replied.

I like to show off my crazy morning hairstyles to the kids.  This morning, I had a sharkfin/ponytail 'do.  I asked Robert if he liked it, and he said, "I love you , Mom."

Robert sang this to me this morning, "Everyone thinks you're old, except Dad, who's older."